Christian Hell Hole

On Monday I went to dinner at one of my new friends flats (grammar?). I very much buy into the New Testament model of faith related meal provision, particularly when it involves 3 courses. When I first went to GVA I joined a church to meet people obliged to be friendly that wouldn’t try and sleep with me. I achieved both and called them my “wholesome” friends. Now I’m back in BRS some of the people I have reconnected with are those that I met in the pub over Christmas. They hold somewhat different views to my Swiss crew; thus, for the sake of continuity (and ‘cause it makes me smile) I shall refer to them as my “unwholesome” friends.

One of the things we discussed was the university residence that their flatmate used to live in. This particular one is called ‘Clifton Hill House’ but, due to the dominating number of Christians (get in there), it got rechristened ‘Christian Hell Hole’. Apparently they would do things like give away toasties whilst inviting them to Alpha courses.

The irony of the name, combined with the cheesiness (literally and in reference to stereotyped behaviour) of the gesture amused me. As did the following comment:

“Why would I become a Christian. They’d only stop bringing me toasties… AND then I’d have to make them for other people?!”

Woah. Talk about profound.

I used to be the toastie receiver. Just to clarify: a toastie is a grilled cheese sandwich. And I am being metaphorical. Before I went to Geneva I lived in the roof of a church with a load of other students, most of who were, inevitably, Christian. I KNEW about the whole reaching out thing. The church would put on free BBQs for freshers and all year long we would get leftovers sent upstairs from various other events. I seldom had to do food shopping. Also, a lot of my flatmates had this whole “I’ve got to be a good witness thing going on” and I can’t lie, it is nice to be surround by people that are consciously making an effort to be friendly.

Then of course going to Switzerland and looking for friends: you can’t go wrong turning up at a church and saying I don’t believe in this but I want to hang out with you and I will listen. People were falling over themselves to spend time with me – not least when I started showing signs of cracking – live conversions would be such a hit on the God channel.

Ok, I do exaggerate a *little*. However, the premise remains that I am batting for the other side now. Which in turns means that I have to go out and make the toastie. Or, failing that, the BBQ. Or, failing that, the excessive niceness. It really must be worth it.

Today (Tuesday but what with the no internet yet I am blogging in advance.) I woke up in a terrible mood. I have a tendency to react quite strongly to lots of activity, by getting really fatigued and 'low mooded' and as such have to be careful not to follow my natural 'go go go go STOP' model. I had overdone it slightly by staying out till 4 am at aforementioned dinner party (OMGoodness you have to watch 'Big Stan'. If you can get past the gay rape premise you will LOVE it. It’s got the feel good factor of Sister Act. Well, some of you may love it, Carolyn definitely won’t ;-)) having been away all weekend visiting and making music in the South. So on Monday I was starting to go and by Tuesday really wasn’t in a good place. Physically, conversationally, compassionately... it was all a big no no.

Or no no no no STOP. Stop letting things get in my way and hold me back from living life and serving God. See I have found that when you don't want to do anything, the last thing you should do it nothing. I started writing this post before I left the house and, well, with strength I would not have had before, I actually went out and got involved. (Which by the way is AMAZING and such fantastic encouragement given the trepidation with which I begin a year of high demands.) This day that meant helping with the welcome BBQ at the church I used to live in. Alongside the people I used to take advantage of and argue with!

So I gave out the proverbial toasties (which is not a grilled cheese sandwich with proverbs hidden inside fortune cookie stylee though how AMAZING would that be?!), made a conscious effort to care and found that I really did. With a hell of a lot of energy! I was reminded of exactly why I changed sides. And it felt good.

After all, everybody is a slave to someone. Why make friends with the ones that have toasties when you can be friends with the One that provided the toasties in the first place – unlimited supply.

Left Behind

Today I was in a French health food shop (good intentions have started!) with my friend Sara. At one point I wonder off and when I went back to look for her she had moved and left her basket where it was. In that moment I was reminded of something funny that happened to me about a year ago when I was still living a Woodies...

So, Woodies is a church in Bristol which has student flats in the roof and I lived there from 2005-7 with a whole bunch of other students/volunteers/crazy evangelists! There were 16 rooms and we shared a large (and dark) kitchen and living room together. Unsurprisingly, the vast majority of my flatmates in both years were Christians, though there were always a few of us 'Heathens' to keep them on their toes. One day I came downstairs (bedrooms were on the 4th floor with beams and sloped ceilings and the communal areas were the next level down) and it was unusually empty for the middle of the afternoon in a student house. Yet the lights were on in every room, there was food in the oven and someone had left the T.V. tuned in to Neighbours. Ordinarily you might shrug and acknowledge that this is typical behaviour for 'our type'. Except, I was well aware that 'our type' was not the same as 'their type' and I confess that the first thing I though of was... is this the Second Coming?! (Please don't get caught up on my theology, I was not and still am not very well informed.)

I spent a few minutes seriously not sure what to do, no-one was in their rooms and this did not bode well for my theory being proved wrong since the saved to non-saved ratio in the place was high. Finally someone returned home and my concern (fear is too strong a word though it certainly did make me wonder, hard) was alleviated. Until I realised that there was a chance my new companion (no names mentioned) was just not sufficiently holy!

Jokes. Evidently it was not The Rapture (theologians bite your tongue) and normality established we had a good old laugh together, particularly over my brief suspicion as to his/her salvation status. Funny what makes you stop and think even if, with the moment passed, you are all too willing to go back to avid disbelief.